Mayuri Kadambande is Director at WakeUpUrbanNaari foundation and the author of Art of Overcoming Rejection. She is on a mission to Empower 1 lakh women to become great leaders with the help of lifechanging tools and solutions. She is a transformational leadership and mindset Mentor.
With 10+ years of experience in operational excellence.
She is also an author of the bestselling book “Art of overcoming rejection ” for which she has been recognized with multiple awards like Bankim Chandra Chatterjee Kala saman Phd convocation award as Literary personality, Sahityakosh Awardee for 2022 and many more.
Mayuri has successfully trained 1000+ people helping them achieve their leadership goals. She believes every woman has right to live an independent & respectful life by developing right mindset one can overcome challenges in their life be it discrimination of color, financial situation, racism, relationship with the family, Workplace politics, sexual harassment, Abuse and many more.
In 10+ years of her work experience in different leadership roles she has experienced challenges that women face while balancing their personal and professional lives, which results them falling into stress, anger, Anxiety, frustration, depression at times even affecting their health in long run.
Mayuri extends her hand to women who are aspiring to make difference in their life through her books, webinars, coaching sessions.
Slogan of WakeUpUrbanNaari is
“Living Respectful life is basic right of every woman “
Art of Overcoming Rejection by Mayuri Kadambande
Art of Overcoming Rejection, based on the true incidents of Nisha’s life, unveils certain incidences that look common externally however they have a long-lasting impact on the human mind. It explains why one must not just deal with rejection for time being but actually overcome it to improve self-esteem and self-confidence.
This is not only a self-help book but also a simple practical life guide and a torchbearer for people who are facing rejection in life. This is especially for those people who ask themselves the question – “Why Me?”
I envision a world where people are free from stress, anxiety, and depression and are living a happy and healthy life- physically, mentally, and spiritually. This book will help people come out of complex feelings of rejection and transform their life. Read, understand and implement the solution given in this book to overcome all feelings associated with rejection. There are exercises at the end of the chapters which will enable you to think and pinpoint the root causes of rejection in your life thus making it one step easier to master the Art of Overcoming Rejection.
Why Wellness of Mental health & mindfulness is necessary by Mayuri Kadambande
You would be surprised to know that the first seed of rejection is actually sowed at your home.
In a few Indian households, children are often told that they are not capable of doing certain things in certain scenarios.
School again is no different, with admission forms being rejected left and right. Young children are unaware of their emotions and it doesn’t make much of a difference. But, as and when they grow, they start feeling bad about things as small as a teacher or parents and relatives not liking them.
Majority of the cases when children feel depressed or rejected is when nobody paid attention to their feelings. The Demon of rejection gets into action and starts growing in the mind of children. As children grow, they grow with the fear of low self-image and start feeling that nobody likes them. Further, it takes less or no time for them to assume they aren’t good enough and this becomes the reality of life which they start living.
This is where children start feeling low on self-image which leads to low self-confidence.
As children grow and reach the teenage years, there are a lot of physical and mental changes happening in their bodies.
And if a child has already gone through many rejections during their childhood or while they are growing up, this void would either make them too adamant and bold or make them shy and incompetent due to loss of self-confidence and self-image.
They are fearful and avoid mixing up with people. Most of the people who lack self-confidence operate from a state of fear and anxiety.
People are carrying unnecessary emotional baggage on their shoulders. Every small rejection keeps piling up in the mind and stays there if not removed at the right time.
There is a lot of social pressure on parents to make their children succeed in life. And the typical comparative mindset of people and relatives adds up to the child’s misery. We usually see parents pressurising their children for scoring good marks to such an extent that they feel committing suicide is easier than scoring marks. They feel it is the end of the world.
Continuous comparison and competitiveness have been taught right from the beginning.
It’s good to be competitive. But to what degree?
And how should one compete?
The mistake that people usually make is comparing their children and teaching them to compete. But, they forget to tell them that it’s okay to fail, that it’s okay if they score fewer marks, that it’s okay to learn from mistakes and that as parents they will still love them. When this part is missed, the children stop discussing things to avoid facing the comparative mindset of their parents.
I am not saying that parents don’t care for their children. I know you love your children a lot.
I am just giving you a heads up; if you are doing so please stop it.
Because you are not doing any good to your children. Let your children be their unique self and if you are a numbers person who believes in statistics, then the below information is for you.
Statistics of NCRB report on the topic of Suicides in India: Every hour one student commits suicide in India. With about 28 suicides reported every day, according to data compiled by the National Crime Records Bureau, it shows that suicide rates increased from 9905 in 2017 and 9478 in 2016. In 2018, 10159 students died by committing suicide. The continuous year-on-year growth trend has been seen in people committing suicide and this data is only for students. If you are a parent, then ask yourself: is scoring good marks
in examinations more important than your child’s life? That’sa no-brainer!
And I see your concern, your child’s life is more important to you.
Often people are stuck in their limited belief system. This belief system is like a tumor in the mind. It keeps troubling you and you don’t realise it until it becomes fatal. Now why I say “until it becomes fatal” is because the seed of Rejection has been sowed long back and we keep accumulating rejection after rejection. So the small seed that was sowed in mind keeps growing with time.
According to the National Science Foundation, research on 27-Nov-2017 showed that an average person has about 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts per day. Of those, 80% are negative and 95% are repetitive thoughts. Now over here when we talk about 80% of the thoughts being negative and 95% of thoughts being repetitive; then how are we going to think creatively?
We are emotional beings and this makes us human. With every rejection, there is a response within oneself. Emotions that arise in case of rejection can be hurt, loneliness, jealousy, guilt, shame, anxiety, embarrassment, sadness, anger, and fear.
And when the human mind goes through these emotions, they react strongly in the following ways:
• Going into defensive mode and entering into unnecessary arguments.
Going into submissive mode – going back into their solitude shell
There are intense efforts being taken by a person to avoid rejection and hence, they react when they perceive that others have rejected them.
This is an intense topic. Let me explain it briefly and in a simple manner.
Most of the emotions can be triggered by personal and impersonal situations. People may feel afraid, frightened, angry, sad, or offended due to the way others might have behaved with them or due to their actions. Sudden rejection comes as a shock especially when it comes from unexpected people. And they simply react in one of the ways mentioned above.
Simply being mindful of our words and behaviour would help one live a peaceful life.
Taking care of our mental health and taking care of mental health of people around us is our responsibility.