What does it really mean to succeed?
For most of us, success is a checklist a cultural script that we use as soon as we learn to tie our shoes. Do well in school. Get a good job. Climb the ladder. Buy the house. Earn respect. Retire comfortably. These are the measures we’ve been left by society, sometimes without ever stopping to question whether or not they are measures of what we actually desire. In There Is An “I” In Win, leadership expert and author Joey Crum challenges this blind conformity to conventional success with electrifying honesty and an invitation to recapture personal vision.
Crum’s book isn’t only a critique of conformity it’s an invitation to reimagine what success is when you strip away everyone else’s expectations. With an urgent and wise voice, he invites readers to strip away the assumptions, drop the inherited measures, and instead wonder: What does success mean to me?
This question may seem easy, but Crum demonstrates just how profoundly the vast majority of us wrestle with it. As children, we’re surrounded by external definitions of worth. Accomplishments are cheered. Failure is dreaded. And being different is commonly misconstrued. So we spend years pursuing trophies titles, wages, accolades before realizing that they leave so little in the way of lasting satisfaction.
By his own deeply personal observations and practical advice, Crum takes readers through what he refers to as the “misunderstood ‘I.'” This is not selfishness, however; it’s about taking individual ownership of one’s journey. Actually, Crum’s “I” begins with three foundational principles: accountability, innovation, and integrity. And when these are applied to how we measure success, they turn everything we’ve ever been taught on its head.
In one of the most touching passages in the book, Crum writes about the moment so many come to realize too late in life that they’ve built another person’s dream. That the job, the life, the status they worked so tirelessly to achieve is hollow because it was never their own. The chapter “Defining Success on Your Own Terms” is a profound one because Crum discusses the tragedy of finding yourself at the pinnacle of a ladder and realizing it’s against the wrong wall.
It is this type of cultural conditioning that Crum dares us to tackle head-on. He invites readers to challenge assumptions of inherited ideals. To ask themselves what success would mean without what other people think. Without the din of social media, family expectations, or the pursuit of comparison. His message is freeing: You are permitted to say, obligated to redefine the rules.
But he doesn’t just leave us with inspiration. Crum offers a process.
Step one, he says, is unlearning. It’s about quieting down those voices which have instructed you as to who you ought to be and finding out what you need at your core. Not what will make you look successful, but what will make you feel purposeful, energized, and aligned.
Step two is establishing values. What do you actually care about? What gets you most alive? Those values, once established, are a compass. Success from there is no longer in status but in alignment. It is in living days that align with your priorities not societies.
Crum’s focus on self-reflection is equaled by an appeal to bravery. Because once you’ve established your values, you need to stand up for them. And in a world that pays dividends to conform, that’s intimidating. The bravery to prioritize family over professional advancement. The self-knowledge to prefer time to money. The guts to step away from something that’s good on paper but lousy in your gut these are the true triumphs Crum espouses.
In so many respects, this book reads like a countercultural manifesto. And yet, its values are ageless. Crum contends that inner success measured in terms of expansion, genuineness, and tranquility always transcends outer approval. The claps subside. The friendships fizzle out. But the fulfillment that comes from creating a life on your own terms? That’s forever.
Crum also doesn’t ignore the risks. He acknowledges the discomfort of comparison in the age of curated perfection. The pang of seeing someone else’s wins on social media and feeling behind. But his advice is sharp: Comparison is a thief. And the only race worth running is the one you’ve chosen, on your terms.
One of the book’s strongest lessons is that purpose does not need to be huge in order to be significant. It doesn’t need to be a career switch or a change-the-world invention. It can be tiny, everyday decisions a career that is consistent with your pace, relationships that align with your values, work that provides quiet satisfaction. The issue is not size but authenticity.
As Crum puts it, “True success is not in winning trophies but in finding purpose and happiness in the path we embark on.” These are words of encouragement to those quietly wondering if their achievements are sufficient. They are a comfort to the high achievers who remain empty. And they are a clarion call to anyone afraid to live differently.
There Is An “I” In Win is not just a book it’s a permission slip. An invitation to begin again. To correct course. To ask improved questions. To create a life that feels like yours. Joey Crum provides not only insight but also support, reminding us that we were never supposed to lose ourselves in the team, in the culture, in others’ expectations. We were supposed to bring our entire self to the party.
In an outcome-obsessed world, Crum presents a counterintuitive argument: that a worthwhile life is not an end to achieve but a journey to embark on. And on that journey, the “I” is not self-centered it’s holy.
